What is your love language?

With Valentine’s day coming up love is in the air.  Honestly, I have my  thoughts about Valentine’s day and all of its superficiality which involves big corporations capitalizing off of sales but I’ll digress.   Amidst all of the gift giving and advertisements centered around making your special someone or someones feel loved, let’s take a moment to focus on “love” in all it’s actuality.  Aside from the chocolates and gifts that are expressions of love for some , let’s skip to the real deal.  The “real deal” being how to show unconditional love on a regular basis which everyone can relate to in some way.  Currently, I’m reading the book “The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts” for couples; specifically, married couples.  The author, Gary Chapman shares his depiction of how to connect with your spouse by expressing love in a way that addresses their true needs and desires.



The author’s idea is based on the premise that “Everyone has an innate emotional need for love” which he believes can successfully be expressed in your significant other’s own language.   Their own “love” language to be exact.  What determines the success of this method?  Well,  the book explains how learning your spouse can be an advantage which benefits both individuals.  Effectively  communicating love in accordance with your spouse’s needs can surely create more harmony within the relationship.  Chapman goes on to explain what he identifies as the 5 love languages that are pretty universal and more on how using this method improves relationships.   Most people should be able to relate to them in their own unique way.  There is even an assessment which has separate profiles based on gender at the end of the book where you can discover your love language.  If you do not have the book you can find the assessment on the official website here (follow the prompt at the top of the page below “Discover your love language” where you will see ‘Click here to begin’).


So, for your wellness challenge of the week I thought you would find it both interesting and beneficial to complete the assessment either online or from the book if you have it (or plan to purchase).  I completed the assessment which only took about ten or so minutes.  It was straight to the point and simple to do.  The five love languages include Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.   My dominant love language at the moment is “Acts of service” as they were found to be the most meaningful to me.

Now, you’ll notice I said “at the moment” because many of us are continuously evolving  and changes happen which affect how we think, feel etc.   I know for sure that I am and my language could change over time.  I would just use it as a guide or however you feel comfortable even if you just are curious.  You can learn more information about the 5 Love Languages on the official website provided in the link above.   Also, there are several other books of the 5 Love Languages series which target singles, military couples, teens and young children.   They are listed among other books by Chapman on the website.  I plan to start with the original and again I recommend it as a basis to assess your love language.

You may agree or disagree but this assessment has been found to be pretty accurate.   At least my husband and I think so.   We can all benefit from improving our communication.  You will learn the importance of your childhood in how you communicate love as well!  If you’d like you can share the results of your assessment too if you desire!   Have a great weekend!



Author: Angelica

Angelica is my name. I'm a licensed graduate social worker from the DMV who has love for everything mind, body, soul related. A devoted wife and mother whose interests include music, art, yoga, books, exercise, meditation, and cooking. Amanisoul is a synthesis of the name "Amani" which means harmony and peace in swahili and the word "soul" which means essence or spiritual self. Discovering one's inner peace involves being healthy mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. I make it my mission to spread the word on how to achieve balance in all of these areas.

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